As far as the dongle and future implications... yes. The way the dongle works is by basically sending a command over the CAN bus telling the AFM not to engage. Because the ECU is telling it to engage, then the dongle tells it not to, the ECU recognised it's command was not followed and responds in kind by throwing a fault code and illuminating the MIL. Because this would be an undesirable behavior for something that is supposed to "fix" a problem, the dongle therefore constantly erases the fault codes on the ECU so the MIL isn't on.
The problem is, at least in states like Arizona, the way they SMOG test all 1996 and newer OBDII equipped vehicles is by simply hooking up to the OBDII port, verifying no codes, verifying the check engine light works, and verifying all the systems are "ready". With the dongle constantly resetting the error codes, the computer is never "ready". So to pass SMOG in such a state, you have to remove the dongle and the let the ECU reach the "ready" stage, which can take several weeks. During that time, obviously the AFM is active again without the dongle in.
If you're just disabling it to disable it, it's a very small risk of the AFM failing during that period. If, however, like me, you had a radiator blow out and cause a severe overheating issue that left char deposits in your engine, and you remove the mesh filter at the oil pressure sensor because the char keeps blocking it, then removing the dongle becomes almost certainly fatal for the AFM lifters
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Furthermore, because it is constantly resetting the ECU, other codes that may indicate other issues are effectively hidden. I had 4 pop up once the dongle was gone
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The performance tuners allow you to simply tell the ECU to stop turning AFM on at all. If it never calls for it, it can't recognize that it didn't respond. Problem solved for good until and unless your ECU is reprogrammed to factory spec.
But again, that's $500 vs $150 or less. The level of risk in your circumstance is something you have to evaluate. I left myself with no choice, though, so don't be me, LOL.
I can't help you with the oil question, unfortunately. I live in Arizona, where 9 months out of the year we fall into the temperature range where 20W/50 is recommended, so I just run 20W/50 full synthetic all year round, which only slightly increases the oil pressure during the "winter". I haven't used anything below 10W/30 in so many years I've almost forgotten they exist, LOL.