My tale of woe

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IEATZ28

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Attend your ear to my tale of woe,
car shopping back during the summer I did go.
I bought a 2015 Escalade perfect and clean,
low miles, two owners, long and lean.
But what came next was quite a surprise,
right after I purchased it it was found on a tow truck being towed by some nice guys.
The dealer said "oh, it's plugs and wires",
I said replace them posthaste, it's what I desire.
Right as rain it did run for a short while,
We enjoyed riding around in such style.
Then starting issues came again so to google did I go,
They said to replace the negative battery cable so back to the dealer two times in a row.
Again, she ran fine for a few short months,
Then my wife pulled into the garage and I heard a noise from the engine all at once.
I knew what it was, but I couldn't believe,
A stuck lifter was all my mind could conceive.
So to another shop we went for a DOD delete,
I thought "all our problems will be solved and the car will be complete".
We picked it up two weeks later ready to flip,
but the next morning in the garage I spotted a drip.
What's that - is it oil, is it coolant, would could it be?
Well, come to find out it was both you see.
Somehow whilst in the shop the head did crack,
So back to the shop we went...back, back, back.
He repaired without charge hastily as he could,
We were back on the road and feeling as we should.
But later that night I smelled something weird,
and, yes, it was exactly as I feared.
Gas! Gas! We are leaking gas,
Get it back the shop and get there fast!
We got it there and he said "no big deal",
You just need an o-ring to fix the seal.
So back on the road we were in a flash,
but now we are feeling quite a gash.
See the vehicle still has intermittent issues starting,
and soon to a different shop we will be departing.
While this might seem like a lot, and I'm sure it is,
I didn't tell you about the new torque converter, the new tires, and other biz.
See we are over $6k deep in this cursed machine,
but many lessons from this have I currently gleaned.
Take your car to a reputable shop and spare no expense,
actually hang on to your old car rather than swinging for the fence.
See, if we had our old Burb we would not have this deep ache,
so don't get shoppy and hang onto your jalopy, for goodness sake.
 

Joseph Garcia

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Attend your ear to my tale of woe,
car shopping back during the summer I did go.
I bought a 2015 Escalade perfect and clean,
low miles, two owners, long and lean.
But what came next was quite a surprise,
right after I purchased it it was found on a tow truck being towed by some nice guys.
The dealer said "oh, it's plugs and wires",
I said replace them posthaste, it's what I desire.
Right as rain it did run for a short while,
We enjoyed riding around in such style.
Then starting issues came again so to google did I go,
They said to replace the negative battery cable so back to the dealer two times in a row.
Again, she ran fine for a few short months,
Then my wife pulled into the garage and I heard a noise from the engine all at once.
I knew what it was, but I couldn't believe,
A stuck lifter was all my mind could conceive.
So to another shop we went for a DOD delete,
I thought "all our problems will be solved and the car will be complete".
We picked it up two weeks later ready to flip,
but the next morning in the garage I spotted a drip.
What's that - is it oil, is it coolant, would could it be?
Well, come to find out it was both you see.
Somehow whilst in the shop the head did crack,
So back to the shop we went...back, back, back.
He repaired without charge hastily as he could,
We were back on the road and feeling as we should.
But later that night I smelled something weird,
and, yes, it was exactly as I feared.
Gas! Gas! We are leaking gas,
Get it back the shop and get there fast!
We got it there and he said "no big deal",
You just need an o-ring to fix the seal.
So back on the road we were in a flash,
but now we are feeling quite a gash.
See the vehicle still has intermittent issues starting,
and soon to a different shop we will be departing.
While this might seem like a lot, and I'm sure it is,
I didn't tell you about the new torque converter, the new tires, and other biz.
See we are over $6k deep in this cursed machine,
but many lessons from this have I currently gleaned.
Take your car to a reputable shop and spare no expense,
actually hang on to your old car rather than swinging for the fence.
See, if we had our old Burb we would not have this deep ache,
so don't get shoppy and hang onto your jalopy, for goodness sake.
Well said!
 

Loki223

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Joined
Apr 27, 2023
Posts
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Location
Elk, WA
when the wife and i bought our burb
we were also quite disturbed.
for the selling dealer
turned out to be a piggy squeeler.
We dug into the bowls of the machine
and poked and prodded until she ran clean
these trucks when treated right run so long
but when forgotten about will turn a song
fix whats broke
or your wallet will croke
then enjoy your hard work
and idk how you got that far into your post continuing to rhyme
guess i didn't end mine in time.



These trucks can be simple and expensive at the same time, and when you find someone else's differed maintenance it gets aggravating for sure. But look on the bright side, while replacing a sensor on our oil pump we found 6 of the main bolts broken that really made me question keeping it, but all the CELs were off, and she purred with only 160k miles on it so we said screw it. Still into this cheaper then finding a perfect example with similar miles. At the end of the day if you find a "stupid good deal that you just can't pass up" it's probably because someone else knows what's hidden and waiting to come at you. IDK if the selling dealer had any idea, he bought it at auction and barely had it a couple of days when i bought it, so i can't in good faith blame him. But the dealer that sent it to auction, at the very least had an idea of the problems. Worst part is none of them were really "that bad" for a DIY guy to fix. Heck if i had paid a shop to fix everything i would honestly probably be about even in her. So if yours is at the point where there aren't issues, enjoy it.
 

Tonyrodz

Resident Resident
Joined
Feb 16, 2012
Posts
31,534
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46,884
Location
Central Jersey
Attend your ear to my tale of woe,
car shopping back during the summer I did go.
I bought a 2015 Escalade perfect and clean,
low miles, two owners, long and lean.
But what came next was quite a surprise,
right after I purchased it it was found on a tow truck being towed by some nice guys.
The dealer said "oh, it's plugs and wires",
I said replace them posthaste, it's what I desire.
Right as rain it did run for a short while,
We enjoyed riding around in such style.
Then starting issues came again so to google did I go,
They said to replace the negative battery cable so back to the dealer two times in a row.
Again, she ran fine for a few short months,
Then my wife pulled into the garage and I heard a noise from the engine all at once.
I knew what it was, but I couldn't believe,
A stuck lifter was all my mind could conceive.
So to another shop we went for a DOD delete,
I thought "all our problems will be solved and the car will be complete".
We picked it up two weeks later ready to flip,
but the next morning in the garage I spotted a drip.
What's that - is it oil, is it coolant, would could it be?
Well, come to find out it was both you see.
Somehow whilst in the shop the head did crack,
So back to the shop we went...back, back, back.
He repaired without charge hastily as he could,
We were back on the road and feeling as we should.
But later that night I smelled something weird,
and, yes, it was exactly as I feared.
Gas! Gas! We are leaking gas,
Get it back the shop and get there fast!
We got it there and he said "no big deal",
You just need an o-ring to fix the seal.
So back on the road we were in a flash,
but now we are feeling quite a gash.
See the vehicle still has intermittent issues starting,
and soon to a different shop we will be departing.
While this might seem like a lot, and I'm sure it is,
I didn't tell you about the new torque converter, the new tires, and other biz.
See we are over $6k deep in this cursed machine,
but many lessons from this have I currently gleaned.
Take your car to a reputable shop and spare no expense,
actually hang on to your old car rather than swinging for the fence.
See, if we had our old Burb we would not have this deep ache,
so don't get shoppy and hang onto your jalopy, for goodness sake.
Did you know it, you're a poet.
 

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