Attend your ear to my tale of woe,
car shopping back during the summer I did go.
I bought a 2015 Escalade perfect and clean,
low miles, two owners, long and lean.
But what came next was quite a surprise,
right after I purchased it it was found on a tow truck being towed by some nice guys.
The dealer said "oh, it's plugs and wires",
I said replace them posthaste, it's what I desire.
Right as rain it did run for a short while,
We enjoyed riding around in such style.
Then starting issues came again so to google did I go,
They said to replace the negative battery cable so back to the dealer two times in a row.
Again, she ran fine for a few short months,
Then my wife pulled into the garage and I heard a noise from the engine all at once.
I knew what it was, but I couldn't believe,
A stuck lifter was all my mind could conceive.
So to another shop we went for a DOD delete,
I thought "all our problems will be solved and the car will be complete".
We picked it up two weeks later ready to flip,
but the next morning in the garage I spotted a drip.
What's that - is it oil, is it coolant, would could it be?
Well, come to find out it was both you see.
Somehow whilst in the shop the head did crack,
So back to the shop we went...back, back, back.
He repaired without charge hastily as he could,
We were back on the road and feeling as we should.
But later that night I smelled something weird,
and, yes, it was exactly as I feared.
Gas! Gas! We are leaking gas,
Get it back the shop and get there fast!
We got it there and he said "no big deal",
You just need an o-ring to fix the seal.
So back on the road we were in a flash,
but now we are feeling quite a gash.
See the vehicle still has intermittent issues starting,
and soon to a different shop we will be departing.
While this might seem like a lot, and I'm sure it is,
I didn't tell you about the new torque converter, the new tires, and other biz.
See we are over $6k deep in this cursed machine,
but many lessons from this have I currently gleaned.
Take your car to a reputable shop and spare no expense,
actually hang on to your old car rather than swinging for the fence.
See, if we had our old Burb we would not have this deep ache,
so don't get shoppy and hang onto your jalopy, for goodness sake.
car shopping back during the summer I did go.
I bought a 2015 Escalade perfect and clean,
low miles, two owners, long and lean.
But what came next was quite a surprise,
right after I purchased it it was found on a tow truck being towed by some nice guys.
The dealer said "oh, it's plugs and wires",
I said replace them posthaste, it's what I desire.
Right as rain it did run for a short while,
We enjoyed riding around in such style.
Then starting issues came again so to google did I go,
They said to replace the negative battery cable so back to the dealer two times in a row.
Again, she ran fine for a few short months,
Then my wife pulled into the garage and I heard a noise from the engine all at once.
I knew what it was, but I couldn't believe,
A stuck lifter was all my mind could conceive.
So to another shop we went for a DOD delete,
I thought "all our problems will be solved and the car will be complete".
We picked it up two weeks later ready to flip,
but the next morning in the garage I spotted a drip.
What's that - is it oil, is it coolant, would could it be?
Well, come to find out it was both you see.
Somehow whilst in the shop the head did crack,
So back to the shop we went...back, back, back.
He repaired without charge hastily as he could,
We were back on the road and feeling as we should.
But later that night I smelled something weird,
and, yes, it was exactly as I feared.
Gas! Gas! We are leaking gas,
Get it back the shop and get there fast!
We got it there and he said "no big deal",
You just need an o-ring to fix the seal.
So back on the road we were in a flash,
but now we are feeling quite a gash.
See the vehicle still has intermittent issues starting,
and soon to a different shop we will be departing.
While this might seem like a lot, and I'm sure it is,
I didn't tell you about the new torque converter, the new tires, and other biz.
See we are over $6k deep in this cursed machine,
but many lessons from this have I currently gleaned.
Take your car to a reputable shop and spare no expense,
actually hang on to your old car rather than swinging for the fence.
See, if we had our old Burb we would not have this deep ache,
so don't get shoppy and hang onto your jalopy, for goodness sake.
